Thuringowa, USA — The trucking industry in the U.S. wrapped up its annual “Truck Driver Appreciation Week” this Friday. Trucking companies across the country participated in small stunts each day to “show their appreciation” for drivers, such as providing breakfast or handing out company-branded coffee mugs. All of this was, of course, accompanied by photo ops and social media posts, clearly highlighting the companies’ deep altruistic nature.
The move has been criticized by truckers’ unions as an out-of-touch, virtue-signaling marketing stunt, given that almost none of the companies plan to use the week to make meaningful improvements in pay or benefits.
When pressed for comment, local Thuringowa Trucking CEO Les Ciudado released the following statement: “We aren’t ‘pay them more’ appreciative, or even ‘treat them better’ appreciative, for that matter. We’re more along the lines of ‘give them half a breakfast burrito once a year’ appreciative. It’s a different level of appreciation—it’s still appreciation, don’t get me wrong—but it’s much lower than the stunt suggests, and that’s where the beauty lies. We get to keep paying low wages and benefits, care little about them, and leave their conditions the same, all while virtue signaling to the world that we’re this giving, caring bunch of people who don’t take advantage of our drivers. I don’t know who cooked this one up, but it’s really quite brilliant.”
Thuringowa Truckers Union President Noel Humble released the following statement in response: “It’s actually refreshing to hear a CEO admit it honestly. Every year we’ve got to listen to how much these companies ‘appreciate us,’ and yet what do they change about our conditions, benefits, or pay? Nada. At least now someone is being honest. Rather than an annual appreciation week, how about this pack of c*nts show genuine appreciation every two weeks on payday?”
The industry often touts a “driver shortage,” but critics argue the real problem is high turnover due to poor conditions and pay. Perhaps if companies used their appreciation to make meaningful changes, this revolving door of drivers could stop. Sadly, that doesn’t appear to be what the industry wants.
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